Dogs and Cats, matter or perspective

The Dog's Diary

8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 pm - Milk bones! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing
5:00 pm - Dinner! My favorite thing!
7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing
8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!
​

The Cat's Diary

Day 983 of my captivity.

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little
dangling objects.

They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other
inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry
nuggets.

Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly
clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to
keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me
going is my dream of escape.

In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on
the carpet.

Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless
body at their feet.

I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts,
since it clearly demonstrates my capabilities.
However, they merely made condescending comments about
what a 'good little hunter' I am.

There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices
tonight.

I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration
of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food.

I overheard that my confinement was due to the power
of 'allergies. I must learn what this means, and how
to use it to my advantage.

Today I was almost successful in an attempt to
assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his
feet as he was walking.

I must try this again tomorrow, but at the top of the
stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are
flunkies and snitches.

The dog receives special privileges.

He is regularly released, and seems to be more than
willing to return. He is obviously retarded.

The bird must be an informant. I observe him
communicating with the guards regularly.

I am certain that he reports my every move.

My captors have arranged protective custody for him in
an elevated cell, so he is safe.

 

Ohh man. That was good.

Expecially about the doggy.

"He's obviously retarded."

 

Having both cats and dogs - I'd have to say ^ ^ this is EXACTLY how they think of us....
Sad, but true.

~Tiger

 

lol,lol...that was a good one